My Defects of Character

  • While I believe in accountability, I know now that there is no way to work the 12-Steps without Anonymity.
  • I've been naive and vulnerable, and underestimated the power of cruelty, and the hazards of being open and honest (please see: Historical Treatments).
  • Following instructions, or taking advice does not excuse me from harmful behavior. I need to know the difference between right and wrong by cultivating my relationship with God, and continuing to evaluate my behavior.
  • While I've been able to open up about the causes and conditions of my drinking, I may have harmed members of my family by doing so.
  • Though I've been taught to work a program, I realized some of the teachings oppose my code of conduct and I had to return to conform with what I was taught first: The Ten Commandments
  • Though I've learned to cope with the consequences of complaints, I used to object to complaints without regard for others (please see: Log).
  • When offended by behavior I do not understand I sometimes panick, or act out of fear and anger without tolerance or compassion for others.
  • Because I believed I was a victim, I thought I had a right to inflict harm, or to cause damage to those who harmed me.
  • Disturbed by sex conduct in my home, I examined the threats we faced and evaluated the capacity to do harm (please see: Self Examination).
  • Shocked by lewd behavior, I was taught by professionals to be discrete about my Parents behavior.
  • Dismayed by allegations of insanity when confronting professionals with behavior I found offensive, I demonstrated what happened when I was a child to be heard.
  • Disrupted and interfered with while exercising my right to free trade, I abandoned current health care practices, the church, and a large part of the recovery community in order to establish alternatives (please see: Sabotage).


  • To try to be helpful to those I've harmed in whatever ways I am able.
  • To be charitable, compassionate and forgiving.
  • To be trustworthy, and reliable without unhealthy attachment.
  • To be responsible, accountable, loyal and true.
  • To be tender, loving, forgiving, gentle, kind, and understanding - and forsaking that, to take my leave and return when I am able.
  • To be respectful, and well mannered.
  • To be pure, and honorable.

What I Failed to Do:

  • Because I despaired, I failed to do what I needed to do. Because I failed to do what I needed to do, I did not make use of my talents.
  • Though it is clear that I've been forgiven in many ways, I am not always able to forgive behavior I don't understand.
  • I am not always capable of taking the blame for others.
  • I have not always respected the privacy and/or confidence of others, and though they may kill to silence us, I've persisted in my efforts to report crime because we must (please see: Hate Crime Scene).
  • I have been unable to prevent much of the harm that continues to myself and others.
  • Failing to notice what bothers others, I may fail to address the most important problems in my life (please see: Transpositions).
  • Not doing my work well, I may fail those that govern, and those I seek to protect and defend.
  • I have not always given back what has been freely given to me.
  • I cannot always put the wants and needs of others before my own needs or the necessities of life and my work.
  • I cannot always prioritize my business because of the disruption and interference to my life.
  • I cannot always prioritize the care of my body, mind, or properties while meeting the demands of my business.

What I Should Have Done Instead:

  • Walk the talk, and make the most of every moment.
  • Learn to respect the boundaries of others, and mind my own business.
  • Consider what might have been, rather than what went wrong.
  • Make amends to those I've harmed, regardless of their conduct with me.
  • Take the time to challenge my own thoughts and beliefs.
  • Respect the power of nature, the authority of those who govern, and the teachers and healers I've been lucky enough to know.
  • Take good care of myself to meet my obligations, and give back to those who survive me.
  • Do right, and build character, rather than focusing on feeling good.
  • Learn from mistakes, and share the way out, not just the problem.